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How can I Stop Complaining?

Lauren Romano
Lauren Romano

Complaining seems to be a part of every day life. Whether it’s at school, work, during travel or at home it’s hard to go twenty-four hours without hearing someone make a negative comment. However, just because people do it, doesn’t mean that they like to. If you are interested in learning how to stop complaining, here are some ideas that may be of help.

In order to stop complaining, the first step should be to avoid doing things that you know will trigger negative feelings. For example, if you are unhappy at your job, looking for one that will leave you in high spirits may be a good start. If you find yourself aggravated whenever you take a certain way home from work, you may want to look for alternate routes that you can take. A few small changes could make a big difference.

Woman with hand on her hip
Woman with hand on her hip

Try and surround yourself with positive people. If you are around people that often complain, then you may find that it encourages you to do it as well. Consider enlisting some of those people in your quest to stop complaining. When you’re around people who are more positive, finding yourself the same way may not be far off.

Another way to stop complaining is to be dig down deep and be more patient. Many of the complaints that are said on a daily basis could be stemming from a lack of patience in certain situations. The next time you get stuck in a traffic jam or any other similar situation, take some deep breaths and tell yourself that it’s not so bad and that eventually it will be over.

When negative thoughts creep into your mind, try and switch to a more positive frame of mind. For example, when you’re behind an incredibly slow person at the supermarket, think about how fortunate you are to have enough money to make the purchase you're about to make. You could find that if you start having a more positive mindset, you may stop complaining without even knowing it.

Complaints aren't constructive and rarely do anything to help with whatever situation you’re in. Some of them may even be done out of habit more than anything else. Also, complaining isn’t good for your stress level. Making negative comments generally leaves many people irritated and agitated. Positive words and phrases may help you and those around you feel more at ease and relaxed. It takes a little work to stop complaining, but it is possible.

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Discussion Comments


I would like to see the evidence (any evidence) for the assertion that "complaining isn't good for your stress level." Seems just as likely to me that it *is* good for your stress level, that it lets you "blow off steam."

I think Americans are an unreasonably optimistic culture and there is too much pressure to be cheerful, whether or not circumstances merit it. I think it's more important for our emotions to reflect reality.


You must first make yourself aware of the fact that you chronically complain. Keep a journal for 24 hours and keep up with every single complaint that comes out of your mouth. It might be easier to have a friend over on a weekend and let them keep the journal. You can then see how much you really complain.

Our mouths generally follow whatever is going on in our heads. Keeping positive thoughts in our head makes it less likely for us to have negative outbursts.


@wesley91: I'm going to have to borrow that method from you! Well spoken!


I am of the Christian faith. When I hear other people continuously complaining about something, I bring to their attention the Israelite's who complained on and on about everything. God let them wander around in a desert for 40 years because of their complaining when it should have been less than a two week journey.

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