How can I Improve my Marriage?

You might be surprised to learn that some of the best tips for improving your marriage are based on the simplest ideas. Start by showing your husband or wife courtesy. This may seem like a given, but couples easily fall out of the habit of showing one another the same common courtesy they show the bank teller or the cashier at the grocery store. Courtesy makes your spouse feel worthy of your respect.

No matter how long you have been married, saying please and thank you will never go out of style, and neither will greeting your partner pleasantly and acknowledging his or her presence. You greet the mail carrier and you speak to the salesperson that comes to your door, but do you greet your spouse as warmly when he or she comes in? You probably did when your marriage was new, so what happened? Always remember that making someone feel special, cared for and worthy, inspires that person to treat you the same way.

If you want to develop a more intimate marriage, try to encourage more intimate communication. While this area is usually addressed by directing you to be more open and honest with your feelings, which is of course important, it also includes becoming a more intimate listener. Do you really take the time to listen to what your spouse is saying, or are you too busy thinking about other things, or planning what to say next?

Another important element in a good marriage is the ability to have fun together. Take some one-on-one time and do something you have not done in years. Go dancing, go for a walk, or go to the park and play tennis. You might even decide to try an entirely new activity; it doesn't really matter what you choose to do as long as you enjoy doing it together. Incorporating fun into your marriage is guaranteed to lessen tension.

It is also important to occasionally get away together from the daily grind, and this doesn't just mean getting away from your work; it also means taking a break from the responsibilities of home and marriage. Take the time to enjoy your spouse, your love, as you did early in your marriage. Even if it is just for the weekend, or if it means running off to a local hotel overnight and dining in a great restaurant, plan that special rendezvous.

Finally, put your spouse's needs ahead of your own, at least on occasion. Making your spouse feel like the most important person in the world--as well as in your marriage--will cause him or her to want to reciprocate. Wouldn't it be nice if someone made you feel that special? Your husband or wife thinks so too.